Names

Now that we are out of the Infertility closet, I figured it was time to use our real names on the blog. I was using Mr. and Mrs. B because we call each other "B" on a regular basis, hence the blog title "Hoping for Baby B." Anyways, no point in being anonymous now. I am Megan and my husband is Nick {it's also on his birthday cake} :)

Easy peasy!

I started the Follistim injections on Saturday night. It was much easier than I anticipated. I am using a Follistim Pen, so it's pretty fool proof. My antral follicle count was 14. I started with 100 IU per day, for three days. I go back to the RE tomorrow for an ultrasound and blood work to see how I am responding and then go from there.

This past weekend was fun. I finally, after 12 years, surprised Mr. B :) I couldn't believe it, but it worked. He had a great party with all of our friends and some family, and more gifts than he has ever received. He said it was the best birthday he has ever had ::blushing::

The Cake, with Apollo and his two favorite toys.

 
Now if I can just give him the best gift of all, to be a Father, before he is 31.

xoxo,
Mrs. B

Happy Birthday, My Love

Mr. B turns the big Three Zero tomorrow! I have plans to spoil him all weekend :) Tonight it's just the two of us. We are going to a delicious tapas restaurant in Long Beach. Saturday we are going to my parent's for a family celebration (minus his parent's, as they are out of town) Sunday I have a surprise planned. He reads this, so I can't share the deets yet :)

I love this silly guy so much!

xoxo,
Mrs. B

Our last IUI

Aunt Flow showed up today, so it's on to cycle 19 and our last IUI. That's a scary thought.

I called Dr. A's office and the nurse went over my medications and costs. She ordered me Follistim, the Novarel trigger and progesterone suppositories. Just the medications alone are $1,009. Yikes. I go in Saturday morning for my baseline ultrasound and to go over my medications, then again on Tuesday to see how I am responding. From there, they will see me for a monitoring ultrasound and estrogen blood work {approximately} every other day until I am ready to trigger. The frequency of the monitoring will depend on how I respond.

I really hope this works, more than ever before.

xoxo,
Mrs. B

I am off to San Diego!

... for a bachelorette party weekend! It's for one of my close friends that is getting married in November. Another busy weekend to keep my mind off of IF, and one last time to enjoy some drinks before I start my next cycle.

I hope you all have a fabulous weekend!

xoxo,
Mrs. B

Infertility Friends

I was reading an article about pregnancy between Infertility friends on Resolve's website. This paragraph summed up how it feels to experience Infertility:

"The experience of infertility plunges people into contact with the outermost reaches of their humanity. Infertility is a profound crisis that threatens identity, relationships, and continuity. It threatens one’s sense of the world, it disturbs beliefs and assumptions, and it belies safety and security. It is an emergency that uses up coping skills, and depletes resources; people start to run on empty as their chronic stress levels move into the area of trauma. Infertility can shut people down emotionally, it necessarily limits and narrows; people are functioning in “emergency mode,” a black and white vantage point that oversimplifies for the purpose of survival. This is not the best place to understand the complexities of human interactions, or the perspective of the “other;” this is a time to survive, and everything else may feel inessential, a luxury."  Anne F. Malavé, PhD

Speaking of this article, I have several e-friends who have Infertility. Some of them are pregnant and some of them are still cycling. I am truly so happy when they get pregnant, and I stay in touch and read their blogs and share in their joy. Isn't that the point of this journey?! For us all to be Moms? I hope all of you know that <3

xoxo,
Mrs. B

{Hopefully} exciting news!

As I am sure you all know, we are 100% OOP {out-of-pocket} for Infertility treatments right now. Mr. B just received his insurance renewal information and the PPO plan they offer has $10K worth of Infertility coverage! My boss is nice enough to pay me what he covered for my company insurance plan so this PPO won't cost us anything. It will take effect 1/1/12. We will still do the injects cycle once AF arrives, but if it does not work, we will wait until next year to start IVF.

I sure hope it's as good as it sounds. I am always skeptical of insurance because they seem to find a way to get around covering things. Hopefully I will be pleasantly surprised.

It's always nice to have a bit of good news during crappy times :)

xoxo,
Mrs. B

Weekend Recap

We were busy! I can honestly say that I didn't feel upset about IF all weekend.

First, we did dinner & a movie with two other couples on Friday night. We saw 50/50. Loved it. I laughed and cried. Joseph Gordon-Levitt is amazing.

Also, I am uber excited about War Horse. It comes out on Christmas Day. 

Saturday we had two birthday parties - one for Sydney's 1st and one for my BFF. I made pumpkin cupcakes with cream cheese frosting for my best friend's party. They were A-M-A-Z-I-N-G!!!! Which is exactly what she deserves. I love you, B.Y. :)

Sunday we woke up early and drove down to Temecula for a horseback ride, lunch and wine tasting. My love gave this day trip to me for Christmas and we finally used it. It felt great to be on a horse again. It really made me want to schedule some jumping lessons while I can still ride. We had so much fun <3

xoxo,
Mrs. B

None in the Oven

Mr. B and I love this new web series. It's so accurate and hilarious. None in the Oven. Enjoy!

Episode 1 - "Advice"

Episode 2 - "Coffee"

The Ultimate Compliment

While visiting our friends and their two kids in Florida, the Mr.'s best friend nudged his wife and said "ask them." Then he turned to us and said "she wants to ask you two something." She told us that they would be writing their will soon and want to list us as the children's guardians should something happen to both of them. Wow. Out of everyone they know, they chose us. We said yes. She said that they felt we are the best fit. Of course we hope nothing ever happens to either of them, but what a huge compliment.

I love these kiddos so much.

xoxo,
Mrs. B

Music Friday {Infertility Edition} - Kellie Coffey

I sobbed through this song.

I Would Die For That by Kellie Coffey

I am so sad

I haven't felt this down in a long time. I was reading a few birth stories on The Bump boards and unexpectedly I felt so sad. I thought about what it would be like to have a baby. I pictured Mr. B by my side and my Mom snapping a thousand photos of the new baby. And I just started crying in my office. It's so frustrating to want something so badly and every attempt fails. I feel like life is slapping me in the face every time. 

This is so fucking hard.

We made it to Florida!

We are having so much fun already and it's our first day here :) I am so happy we took this break from work and treatments. I hope everyone has a great weekend. Cheers!