I told myself and all of you that I wanted to keep Number Two's journey to ourselves. But I guess I was lying to myself. As soon as I saw that stark white negative test staring back at me while I willed a line to appear, I realized I need this place to share.
We want Number Two just as much as we wanted our first baby. Having one child doesn't diminish the desire for more or the pain of Infertility. I knew it was possible that this wouldn't work, but I must have convinced myself it would and there would be nothing to worry about because it worked before. I even said that I felt confident we could have another baby with help, and now I don't feel that way. Mostly because we had been trying on our own for a while and no pregnancy, so going back to Dr. A gave me some hope. And now I've lost that little bit of hope I had. Everything went right, but it just didn't happen.
I'm picking my sorry ass self off the ground and carrying on, because that is all there is to do. I don't know when we will cycle again because we are going on vacation in October.
Tuesday, September 10, 2013
Ahhhhh. My blog. I haven't posted in a few weeks. I need this place. It's therapeutic for me.
Life has been good. Time continues to fly by and Grayson continues to make our lives amazing. We spend our evenings cracking up at his silliness. He is walking everywhere, repeating words, he knows the cow goes "moooo" and the cars go "vrooooom", he knows where his nose is and he is growing like a weed, even reaching door handles and opening them! It's crazy. I didn't think it was possible to love him any more than I do, but it just multiples as the days go by.
|Cruising around the backyard. His favorite place to be is outside.|
|We went to Disneyland with Nick's family in August.|
|We celebrated Apollo's 7th birthday.|
|The new pool fence. We all love it. G can run around and play without us worrying he will fall in the pool.|
|He put himself in the x-pen.|
|And even went to work with Mom :)|
|My parents adopted the sweetest English Pointer named Blu. We love him!|
|My handsome baby is all grown up. Tear.|