Thursday, February 3, 2011

The Tales of my BIL

I could start an entire blog about Mr. B's brother! We will call him C. First, I need to give you a brief introduction, then we will move on to the hilarious stories. To be quite frank, C doesn't care about much. He has an amazing ability to not care. I should really take some tips from him, since I am the exact opposite. C is 31 years old. He lived with his girlfriend for about 6 months, but lives with his parents again now.  This story is mostly about three of his cars. None of them survived long.

C had a Toyota Corolla that he parked on the street in front of my in-laws house. They live on a hill. Naturally, C did not use his e-brake and in the middle of the night, the Corolla rolled backwards down the hill. It stopped on top of the gas main in front of a neighbor's house, spewing gas fumes into the air. Every fire truck and police car in town showed up. And of course the gas company. A neighbor woke up my in-laws and they walked down to see what had happened. C glanced at the damage, shrugged and went back to sleep. Nothing to worry about there LOL.

C's next car was a nearly brand new Honda Civic, a hand-me-down from his parents. Nice... a free car. He drives it everywhere and drives for work, so the miles add up fast. He drives it all the way from Orange County, California to Cabo San Lucas. Along the way to Cabo, the "wheel fell off", he grinded the driver's side of the car into a guard rail and the bumper was smashed. No worries. It still runs, right? Sure does, until the oil goes dry and no one adds more. Honda's are amazing. This car ran for a long time before the engine finally blew up. We took the car, cleaned it up and put a new engine in it, and now we are selling it.

C's parents bought him a brand spankin' new Scion XB. Nice... another free car, this time brand new and shiny! C is reminded to take care of his car and keep oil in it. C moves back home a few months ago. The XB has dents and scrapes all over it. We ask what happened. C says he was driving down an alley and a car was coming toward him. He decided that instead of backing up to make room for the driver to pass, he would squeeze against the alley wall and pass the car. No big deal, it's just paint being scraped off. A month ago, the XB's engine just stopped. My father-in-law checked the oil. None. The plug in the oil pan is also missing. Yikes. They put a new plug and some oil in the car and the car runs again! Woot! Seriously, Honda's and Toyota's are amazing. But they can only take so much. Today the XB died for good. Now, for the best part....... C took a loan out on the XB, with a 99% interest rate. Yes, I know. How is that even possible?!?! And they took his pink slip. Shady biz right there. He cannot afford to pay back the loan, so they are giving the dead car to the loan shark.

Any time Mr. B calls me and says "Soooo, my Dad just called me", I know it's another C story. Normally, I would feel bad sharing someone's misfortunes as my entertainment. But this is C we are talking about here. He honestly doesn't care!

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