Cora

It's been 7 days since our little miracle girl arrived. My c-section went very smoothly and she was healthy as can be. I had a few hours of feeling really crappy, but things got better much faster than last time. She latched very well right from the start. Breastfeeding has been so much easier the second time around, mostly because I know what I am doing. At her 2 day check-up, she was up 4 ounces to 7lbs 14 oz!! We were thrilled! Especially after the struggle I had getting Grayson's weight up in those first two weeks. We are getting into a good routine and her night time feedings are spreading apart. The first few days at home were tough because she was waking every hour to eat and the exhaustion hit me like a ton of bricks. I am doing so much better physically these last few days. It always makes things easier once I can move around and do the things I normally do, like get out of our bed without a lot of help. We are excited for a little trip out with both kids tomorrow. Grayson has been going to school every day, but we decided to use Fridays as family days while Nick is still on leave.

But the post-partum hormones, oh my! This time has been different and really hard. I am so happy to have her here and my feelings haven't been directed at her in any way. It's just been a very emotional adjustment for me. I went from being 100% Grayson's mama, taking care of his every need, taking him to school, making his meals, reading to him each night and then all of a sudden I had to focus all of my mama energy on a new baby. It's a big transition. I was feeling guilty. I was feeling disconnected from my little man. Honestly, these feelings have been the hardest part of all of this because I know they are irrational and I know they are temporary, but oh are they strong. It's difficult for me to get past them at times and so I just cry. I read a text and cry. I go along with Nick to pick up Grayson from school and I cry. My mornings are always fine - it's the afternoons that get hard. I have noticed some improvement as I am getting more sleep. The good thing is that I am aware of these emotions and I am watching to make sure that things get better in the next few weeks. 

Some photos from our first week...